50 Shades of Grey the movie was entertaining, but more importantly eye-opening. But, not in the way you think.
The movie and books have revealed a truth about our society — that we are emotionally and sexually repressed. Don’t let critics or haters just blame one group of people—housewives or women for that matter—it’s most folks.
In general, people are emotionally stunted — unable to feel the spectrum of feelings available to them because for the most part, they are afraid. We are sexually inhibited because of our upbringing, society expectations, and self-judgement.
50 Shades of Grey has shined the light on this discrepancy. This is the reason the romance book section has sky rocketed in Amazon and has always been a favorite movie genre. Yes, we can blame its popularity on women if we want to play the “blame” game, but since women are more in touch with their emotions, it was inevitable — we are starved to find some satisfaction.
Our yearning has reached the tipping point where a book such as the 50 Shades of Grey—a poorly written erotic fantasy—could be so successful. One could say this book is the ‘poster-child’ for many women (not all) who long for something more.
Forget the BDSM content of this book and movie — those per se are not the “needs” that women want fulfilled. The fact that this genre—romance, erotica, fantasy—is so popular, yet is considered a “dirty” little secret is the real issue. Most people who read such books keep it under-wraps—hidden in their Kindle library—for them to enjoy in secret or with their close girl friends.
As a forty something woman, with friends and sisters to draw my experience — women want more than what they’re getting in and out of the bedroom. But, there’s a stall—a break in the communication—in ourselves that stops us from asking and attracting what we truly desire.
Many women—not all, and I do know some who seem to be emotionally aware and sexually satisfied—are afraid of their own emotions.
They don’t know how to express or feel fully their deepest feelings and this is for many reasons. Some of which could be related to bad experiences, trauma, upbringing, and belief systems. We are left unfulfilled in many ways because we can’t let go of the “pains” of the past. We are regulated to get a semblance of satisfaction through books and movies instead of real life.
As far as why lots of men are emotionally unavailable—though I’m not a psychiatrist—I have observed it’s due to their upbringing, past experiences, and society expectations.
No matter the reason, both men and women need to ‘feel the feelings’ in order to find more happiness in every aspect of life.
And the time is now.
Speaking to my soul sisters — don’t be afraid of your emotions. Don’t let society tell you…
“Don’t be so emotional.”
“It’s not that serious.”
and “Why don’t you smile?” Fuck that shit.
Your emotions—the ones that make you smile and particularly the ones that don’t—makes you able to feel the full possibility of what life has to offer you. And that is a beautiful thing. Your emotions are your humanity.
Your emotions are a window to the deepest understanding and peace you can ever feel.
Surrender to feel YOUR feelings FULLY and find out what it’s really like to be alive and satisfied.
But I digress… back to the movie review. Dakota Johnson stole the show.
She played the character of Anastasia Steel “sweetly innocent” enough, but it was her fearlessness as an actress to bare her body and emotional soul that is commendable. I’m not afraid to admit that I want to be so free as to let my deepest desires play out — how tantalizing.
Imagine, to love oneself enough to feel all the different ways love wants to express itself. Now that’s romantic.