Suffering is the emotional state of feeling “pain, distress, and hardship” and for many, these feelings last for some time. Most of us have suffered at some point in our lives and inevitably — as an act of survival — we realize we’ve “suffered enough.” Like a harsh wake-up call, we determine with a fair amount of certainty that because of our painful situation, we’re either going to break down, break somebody, or by golly, break free. Many speak of this moment as “reaching the end of their rope” or “hitting rock bottom.” (Does this resonate with anyone?)
These dire moments also help people have a breakthrough. They figure out something — that life is not supposed to be like this — and then they find the courage within themselves to do what they need to do.
So yes, we’ve all suffered. But, it begs the question, why do we have to suffer for so long — where we need to get to a breaking point — before we make a change?
Why can’t we identify suffering earlier and resolve it sooner so that we suffer less?
I believe we can and it begins with a choice.
“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.” ~ Haruki Murakami
Here’s what I know…
You will suffer in life. If you try to avoid it, you will merely prolong or postpone the suffering.
Life isn’t about suffering, but suffering seems to be an essential component to our growth and expansion as conscious humans and soul-beings.
On the other hand, if one wishes for a life without suffering, what they’re really saying is, “I am scared that I cannot handle the challenges set before me.” This way of thinking will not get a person far because life is filled with obstacles and plainly — shit happens. Instead, wish for courage, strength, and wisdom. Such prayers will be answered quicker and you’ll be made more formidable. (Formed-and-made-able!)
The key to less suffering is to not avoid it. The ideal is to be aware of the suffering sooner, resolve it as best you can, learn the lessons you must, and then move beyond it.
We have to acknowledge — as early as possible — what is uncomfortable, painful, and scary to us. Then, we must surrender to it. Feel the ugliest parts of it fully so that it brings us to that proverbial “breaking-point” (sooner than later) where we have no choice, but to act and change.
We can suffer less when we choose to see our suffering sooner.
Don’t ignore what is painful.
Don’t ignore what is scary.
Your metal is harder sister.
If you’re reading this post, that’s proof of your strength. How? As my uncle George recently told me, “So far, you’ve survived 100% of your worst days. You’re doing great.” (We’re survivors ma!)We can suffer less when we choose to see our suffering sooner. Click To Tweet
How do you become aware of your suffering sooner?
By paying attention to your feelings.
Are you worried all the time? Do you find yourself sad or feeling incomplete most days? Are you angry a lot? Do you cry often? Do you say things like, “Why is this always happening to me?”
Life isn’t a bed of roses, but it shouldn’t be all thorns either. If you find yourself feeling negative feelings most of the time, then that means you’re suffering.
Now having a bad day doesn’t mean you’re suffering. It means you had a bad day. The truth is, only you know if you’re in a bad state. If there is any confusion, ask your heart if she’s OK. And then, listen.
What do you do once you become aware of your suffering?
You fix and heal the situation and yourself as best you can.
You pray for courage, strength, and wisdom. You call your closest friends and family for advice and help. You seek out other people (professionals, counselors, and so forth) that you think might help you. You think positive. You make a plan. Then, you make a promise to yourself to do your best to end this “suffering.”
Despite everything I’ve said in this post — that it’s best to see our suffering sooner so that we suffer less — it’s just the “hope” and ideal, but when you are able to break free from anything that is no longer serving you — that’s all good! And the moment you do it, that was the exact right time for you.
Tweet it like you mean it:I've survived 100% of my worst days. I'm doing great. Click To Tweet
If you need help sister — someone to guide you out of the suffering — check out my EFT & Matrix Reimprinting services.