A few people have been credited with saying, “the grass is greener where you water it.” It doesn’t matter who said it, but when I heard it—it was a light-bulb moment.
Too bad I learned this belief in my late thirties—it sure would’ve been useful to know sooner—but since I’m timeless and I know it (teehee), I’ve applied it to everything ever since!
Real-life examples of how I’ve put this idea to work:
My Sex Life
In my late 30’s my libido and need for romance awakened—big time. I’ve always had friends and knew of people who were sexually free and basically had a lot of sex. I never saw myself as that person. It was in my mind that I could take or leave sex. In fact, before being with my partner of 13 years, I was celibate for almost 3 years.
Then, something happened. I don’t know if it was hormones or this thing that women go through around that time, but I woke up one day and I had these needs. I wanted more kindness, gentleness, and flirting. I wanted more compassion, connection, and touching. Does this resonate with any of my sisters of a certain age?
Not that I didn’t have kindness, compassion and gentleness in my life before, but the need for it became a priority. I had a good amount of touching and flirting with my partner, but then it became a bigger need. I wanted more.
The more popular “grass” quote is, “the grass is always greener on the other side,” and that’s how I saw sex and romance—as something other people experienced more than me. I decided to fix that. If “the grass is greener where I water it,” then I was going to make it rain! 😀
Sh!z got real when I decided to focus the work on myself. I realized, ‘oh, I’m not a sexual person because I have such and such “issues” from my bad experiences and learned such and such “beliefs” from them.’ So I had to heal that stuff. Through a surrendering process and Matrix Reimprinting, I healed those bad memories and limiting beliefs.
Next, in my “make it rain” program, I decided to bring forth more “romantic and sexual” energy around me. I worked on my root and sacral chakras to make sure they were balanced and happy. I dressed up—make-up, clothes, perfume and so on—invoking my feminine divine.
I did sensuality awakening exercises. I read romance novels every evening before bed. (I wanted to bring that romance book sex into my real life!) I read other books about healthy love relationships and communication.
All this self-work gave me the confidence to speak out loud—to my receptive and adoring partner—and say what I wanted in a way where he could hear me. (He’s not always “receptive & adoring,” but since I know my words, thoughts, and beliefs have power—I focus on these traits of his.)
Also, this energy is not slowing down for me. Now in my 40’s, it’s even more important that I continue to “water” this baby. And yes, zee plan is working! 😉
Check out my vision board that I created from my last Vision Board Workshop I taught in San Francisco.
Another time when I decided to “water my grass” was when I became dissatisfied with my career. Having a career that I enjoyed was not foreign to me, I chose to work in the health and fitness industry because I really liked it and thought it was a good way to make a living. But, the idea of doing something I loved and was passionate about—and making real money doing that—was not as believable.
I saw how others were able to do it—but in my mind—those guys had something I didn’t. They were more special than me. They were more qualified than me. They were more deserving than me. I thought their grass was greener!
This kind of thinking was wrong and without having to tell you the whole process, which was very similar to the example above—healing negative self-beliefs and inundating myself with what I really wanted to do—I decided to go after my dreams of being a life-coach and healer.
One more example where I used this system of refocusing my attention and energy to get more out of life was when I got in a creative and passionless funk and was jealous that my boyfriend had all these fun and exciting outlets.
My partner always inspires me. I have great regard for his ability to learn, focus, and be disciplined. I admire his work ethic that pushes him to go after what he wants and how he becomes generally exceptional at them.
Though, at some point — it became annoying.
I admit that I became jealous that he’s this awesome attorney who helps others and basically, I see him as a “power for good” and then he goes and has cool hobbies too. (The nerve!)
He’s an accomplished electronic music composer. Creating music in his spare time that to me, is so moving and beautiful. He also has a great eye for art and photography and creates his own “photo manipulation art” which again, is amazing.
To top it off, he races motorcycles. He has this slick sexy machine and gets to wear a super-hero looking leather suit! (I want a super-hero outfit!) Anyway, more than anything, he has so much passion for motorcycles that it just makes me green with envy.
I want to be passionate about something so much that I get super excited every time I have a chance to do it. (Who wouldn’t want that?!)
I used to feel that way when I was learning ballroom dance, but that feeling faded when too much “competition energy” was placed on me. I was always super excited when I designed mobile apps. I felt totally consumed by the creative fervor when I was building them that I would forgo sleep to get it done. It was awesome.
I was passionate about writing music too, even coming out with an album many years back. I wrote a few wellness and children’s books because I was inspired. I realize my passions come and go and that’s OK. I have a feeling something will blossom within me soon enough as long as I’m “watering my grass” by doing and following what excites me.
What areas in your life do you want to focus your energy so that it becomes more of what you want?
If you have an idea—go water it.
Heal your blocks. Surround yourself with the energy you want and make it happen for yourself. Isn’t it about time you watered your own grass?!
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If you want help refocusing your energy so that you can enjoy life more, then check out my life-coaching services.