Category Archives: Health-Healing Personality

7 Signs You May Die with Regret and How to Turn It Around

Dying with regret or finding yourself feeling like you missed out on life is no place to be. Learn the signs that tell you it’s time to change your ways so you can start moving towards the life you DO want and enjoying the well-being you deserve.

The top 5 most common regrets of the dying as reported by The Guardian:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Your current way of life may or may not contribute to a life of regret, but it isn’t hard to imagine how a life only lived in the “rat race”—an existence where you’re constantly climbing, competing, and comparing—will make a life filled with stress and disappointment. Competition and comparison being at the root of unhappiness for many people. Also, we were not born to only work, pay bills, and buy an endless amount of stuff. We were born to experience, explore, learn, and grow.

Granted, valuable life experience can be had in the workplace, through the trials of competition and comparison, in buying a home, and even in shopping, but it can’t be the majority of one’s life experience. The top 5 regrets of the dying was not about wishing they worked more or had more things—they wanted to feel, express, and connect more.

At the end of their lives, they wished they lived a more authentic life. An existence where they felt their feelings fully, expressed them honestly, and enjoyed themselves truly. They wanted a life where they made their wants and needs a priority over what others expected and they wished they had spent more time with their loved ones.

To avoid regret in our twilight years we have to be aware of how we’re living today. We have to be more mindful of our life choices knowing that each decision has a consequence. That each choice made regularly brings us closer to a certain end.

The more we try to make better choices—decisions that support our happiness and well-being—the less likely we will look back on our time on earth with disappointment.

Here are 7 signs that reveal your current lifestyle is moving you towards a life of regret and some ideas on how to turn things around.

1. You’re unhappy—a lot.

If you find yourself feeling unhappy most days, then it’s time to fix your life. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad, mad, annoyed, and so on—feeling the full spectrum of human emotions is important to our  personal growth and humanity—but you deserve to feel a general contentment and happiness most of your days. If this is not the case, here are things you can do:

A) Get help. Go see a life counselor, coach, or therapist who can help navigate your life to a happier state.

B) Be honest with yourself. Write down the top 3 things you’re unhappy about and then create an action plan to make things better. You have more power and options than you think.

Sometimes you just need to sit down with a pen and paper, and write out what you want in life. People who write down their goals have a better chance of achieving them. Of course, you need to follow it up with action—listen to your own valuable advice.

C) Heal yourself. There is a reason—an event, a behavior pattern, a limiting belief, a set of circumstances you’re always attracting—that is contributing or creating your unhappiness. Get to the heart of your problems and heal them so you can move on and be happy.

2. You get angry quickly.

Do you feel like you “lose it” easily? Do you snap at people—especially your loved ones—without a second thought, even for the smallest thing? Being mad all the time can destroy your relationships and lead to many regrets.

Anger is an emotion you don’t want to hold on to for too long. It can cause disharmony in your personal connections but even more so, feelings such as rage, indignation, and irritation—anger in its different forms—can “feed” illness and disease by way of distress on the body. Anger also affects mental clarity and spirit balance.

If you’re upset often and you think it’s “not normal” to be so mad, then seek help. There maybe an underlying issue beneath all your anger and frustration. Reach out to friends and family that may understand what you’re going through. Take anger management classes and join appropriate support groups that can help you feel better. Turn to a counselor, therapist, or your place of worship for help and advice.

It’s not easy to change one’s feelings from anger to happiness immediately. If the anger runs deep—stemming from bad memories and trauma—then there is a road of healing that must be traveled before a person can be free of it. In order to die without regrets, our deepest hurts must be resolved.

In order to die without regrets, our deepest hurts must be resolved. Click To Tweet

3. You have poor health.

If your health isn’t the best right now—and you do nothing about it—it will get worse as you age. Being unhealthy when you’re older can be very problematic. Not only does the body heal slower when we’re older—it’s costly. With most people living on fixed incomes in their old age, massive medical bills can eat away at any retirement savings.

It’s easy to imagine what regrets an older, sickly person can have: “I wish I worked out more.”, “I wish I ate better.” “I wish I went to the doctor sooner.”, and so on. Regrets such as these can be avoided by making smart, manageable, and consistent choices that support one’s health and well-being now. You don’t need to eat perfectly or exercise like a maniac to have good health. Point of fact, I advice my clients to be “good”—that’s eating and moving just enough—80% of the time.

In my early thirties I already felt like a senior citizen because of my chronic back pain. I was constantly anxious about my future thinking, “If this is how I feel now, what will it be like in my 60’s and 70’s?” I did not want to live in regret or pain. I decided that it wasn’t too late for me to fix my back problems so that I can give myself a brighter future. Now, in my forties, I’m enjoying being 99% pain-free.

What decision can you make today that contributes to your good health so that your future self will thank you?

Don’t wake up to regret later. Do something for your health & wellness now and be consistent about it. Here are 3 things you can do to get you started or keep you going…

A) Surround yourself with the right people. Get a gym membership. Join a yoga studio. Create a fitness-sisterhood with your girlfriends. It doesn’t matter how you do it, what matters is that you hangout with people who are interested in living healthy so that you can motivate and support each other.

B) Do a health or fitness program. From Weight Watchers to the Whole30, I’ve seen women find more success when they are guided by a program. It makes sense, as with achieving any goal—you need a plan—in order to make it happen.

If I may be so bold as to suggest one of my fitness plans… If you want a jump-start your health & fitness goals—and improve your posture and confidence to boot—join my Better Posture in 30 Days program. With it, you’ll create better habits—learning to do 5 minute exercise routines—that focus on body awareness, helps develop better neuro-muscular efficiency (that’s the ability of your brain to talk to your muscles), and improves core strength.

C) Get a professional to help you. Nothing beats having the guidance of a health & fitness professional. They can create a plan that will help you achieve your wellness goals. They can push you to succeed and urge you to keep going when you feel less than motivated.

Also, I’ve found from my extensive experience as a personal trainer and life-coach—when people pay for something—they feel more compelled to follow through. Whether it’s because they don’t want to miss an appointment, let their coach down, or waste their money—people seem doubly invested in making their goals happen when they invest money in themselves.

4. You feel like a robot.

If you feel like a robot now—a slave to your job, bills, and circumstances—and you do nothing about it, you will have regrets later in life. You will be—as those people interviewed in the “Top 5 Regrets of the Dying“—someone who wished they didn’t work so hard and let themselves be happier.

If you feel mindless—going day to day in a type of fog—neither being engaged or inspired by life, then it’s time to wake up. You were not meant to be a robot. No human is. You are a soul meant to have a human experience filled with all kinds of emotions—from sadness to elation, from boredom to excitement, from fear to hope, and so on. But, don’t get stuck in the mire of life; it doesn’t need to be such a trek.

You can choose to have a more meaningful life by deciding everyday to act in support of your dreams, happiness, and well-being.

If you don’t want to be a robot all your life, then don’t give up on your dreams.  Having dreams—goals, wishes, and deep desires that you try to reach—can inject new vigor and interest in your life. When you live in pursuit of your dreams, you won’t feel like you’re walking mindlessly through your existence. You will feel like you have a purpose.

Your dreams may not be the same as when you were young—as dreams evolve—but it’s never too late to reach for a new goal. If you have a deep wish—something you want to achieve or have—write down a plan, think positive, and follow it up with concerted action!

One way to not feel like a robot is to do stuff that makes you smile, laugh, and be happy. Watch funny movies, hang out with friends, and / or pick up a fun hobby. Basically, participate and play in your life. The more fun you have in life, the less likely you will have feelings of regret later.

Another way to not feel like a “worker-bee-drone” is to do self-care. Get massages, meditate, go for walks on the beach, or things of that nature. Self-care is any act that helps you feel better, healthier, and gives you peace of mind. When you take care of you—and you do this for a lifetime—you won’t regret it.

5. You have unhealthy vices.

Vices such as drugs, smoking, excessive drinking, binge eating, sugary food, extravagant expenses, immoderate TV /  smartphone / gaming usage, and participating in volatile relationships will lead to a life of regrets. Overindulging in these vices can destroy your body, mess up your mind, and put you in debt at the very least. At the worst, you can lose your life and alienate yourself from your loved ones in the process. Most people who travel down this path have many regrets later in life.

If you have any of these issues, fix them now. Talk to your doctor, join the right self-help and support group, and heal the reasons behind what is driving you to turn to these vices. In my experience with risky behavior, you have to heal the root cause or else you just replace the vice with another.

6. Your physical appearance has drastically changed for the worst.

If your appearance denotes “unhealthiness”—this can mean anything from deep bags in your eyes because you’re burning the candle at both ends or having gained or lost a lot of weight due to stress—and you continue as you are, you’ll end up with a load of regrets.

Looks aren’t everything, but they do tell the story of how a person takes care of themselves. From their physical health to their self-image, and self-love beliefs—one’s outside appearance is a representation of their inside health and well-being.

There was a 2+ year period in my twenties where I mostly wore sweats, no make-up, and had a general lack of regard for my appearance. Just by reading that sentence, what do you think was the state of my mind, body, and spirit health? Exactly. I was unhealthy. Nothing is wrong with wearing sweats or going without make-up, but for me it was a drastic change from my normal appearance and it was a sign that I was depressed.

If your “look” has changed because of unhealthy reasons—get help. Go to people you can trust. Reach out to organizations that specialize in whatever it is that is ailing you. Ask for help from doctors, therapists, and holistic care practitioners that have experience with what you’re going through.

It’s never too late to ask for help, to make better choices, and to act differently so you can have a brighter future.

7. You neglect your family and friends.

As we’ve learned from the top 5 regrets of the dying, not spending time with loved ones is a pained regret. Not expressing our feelings and letting things go “unsaid” to people we love is also a regret for many. Don’t be that person.

Ask yourself, “What will I gain if I spend more time with my kids? What will I or they lose if I don’t?” or “What will I gain if I spent more time with my Partner? What will I lose if I spend less time with him or her?”, and so on. Remember, your decisions move you forward to a certain outcome. If you want to move towards a life of less regret, then make choices you won’t regret.

Say the things you want to say NOW. As no one is promised tomorrow—there is no better time than the present to express your feelings of love and appreciation.

If you feel other emotions such as anger, unhappiness, distrust, and so forth, express them too. Feel your feelings fully, express them when you can think clearly, and decide what to do with your feelings by thinking how can you be more loving to yourself and all parties involved.

To die with regret may be one of the worst feelings—especially if you realize you could have changed things by making different choices. Decide to improve the quality of your life today so that when you look back, you’ll remember your time with a warm heart and a sense of satisfaction.

Tweet it like you mean it!

I want to do what I can today to be healthy and happy so I don't regret my life later. Click To Tweet

If you need help creating a more meaningful life then checkout my life-coaching services.

Your coach,

Jeanne

Source:

Top 5 Regrets of the Dying

7 Key Steps to Aging Well

When someone is described as “aging well” they are normally being judged by their ability to keep their youthful looks—but is that really aging well?

While retaining a youthful appearance is one aspect of aging favorably, it certainly should not be the bench mark. Along with taking care of one’s physical looks—as I totally support caring for your temple—I define aging well as having a sharp mind, vibrant energy, being able to move with ease, having no illness or disease, possessing a timeless attitude, and most of all, having achieved mind-body-spirit harmony.

Wouldn’t you agree a person who possessed all those things to be “aging” well?

Because what’s the point of looking young if say one’s body had no vitality, if the mind had no clarity, or if spirit was neglected and thus leaving the person lacking in joy and hope for life? (Joyfulness and hopefulness being essential character traits of a youthful person.)

What About DNA?

Some people believe that DNA—the genes you were born with—is the most important factor in whether a person will be healthy in life and if they will age well.

DNA is a contributing factor, but not the determinative “end all” that many would like to blame.

As you age your DNA and family health history become less influential and your attitude and actions—your daily life choices—is what shapes your total well-being.

My family health history tells me that I can get Type II diabetes easier than most. I’ve had several dear family members lose limbs and their lives to the disease. Point of fact, in my early thirties I was warned by my doctor of having a blood sugar count of over 100mg which is considered prediabetes.

The irony of learning this about myself was during that time I was a personal trainer and a teacher for the Stanford Center for Research in Disease Prevention at Stanford University, to prevent Type II diabetes in young girls through dance, nutrition, and mentorship. Here I was helping people to be healthier and to prevent this disease and I was becoming prediabetic.

You can learn more about my back-to-health story, but basically I was able to remove myself from the prediabetic category and successfully avoid the disease that has affected so many of my family by making key lifestyle changes.

Diabetes is not the only family “disease” that I’ve been able to steer free of. I’ve also remedied, if not totally cured myself of Asthma, digestive and bladder problems, and other issues I would rather not mention. Am I special in someway that I was able to avoid illnesses that I’m genetically predisposed to? The answer is—no. I just made different choices that helped prevent and / or heal the things that could have adversely affected my health.

Many of us know someone whose family has been touched by cancer. We know that some of these cancers are hereditary, so when a child of a parent who suffered from such a cancer makes a decision to help prevent themselves from getting that disease—such as eating healthier, moving more, or opting for surgery that lessens their chances—then it is by these choices that they will experience better health.

The opposite is true as well. You could have inherited genes that make you age better and help you have better health than most, but if your daily life is filled with stress, if you smoke and drink alcohol in excess, if you over eat and hardly move, then no amount of good genes will help keep your youthful appearance or good health.

To buy into the myth—that you are stuck with your genes—is to disempower yourself.

You have the power to create a better life by fixing your attitude and acting in support of your health and life goals.

“Perception is awareness shaped by belief. Beliefs ‘control’ perception. Rewrite beliefs and you rewrite perception. Rewrite perception and you rewrite genes and behavior… I am free to change how I respond to the world, so as I change the way I see the world I change my genetic expression. We are not victims of our genes. We are masters of our genetics.” ~ Bruce Lipton Ph.D., cellular biologist

How to Age Well

1. Keep your mind sharp. Never stop learning and always stay curious.

2. Be vibrant. Your energy will ebb and flow naturally, but be engaged—participate—in life.

3. Stay physical. The human body is most beautiful in motion. Move in a way that feels good and do it often enough to be good for you.

4. Keep healthy. Do what you can to prevent illness and disease. Choose what’s good for you 80% of the time. You have power over yourself to improve your life—in every way.

5. Develop a timeless attitude. Your age is not a handicap. It’s a blessing.

6. Get your glow on. Do your self-care. You’re at the age where you don’t need to feel guilty about it. You deserve it sister. Make yourself feel good. We know your outer beauty is but a small reflection of your inner divine loveliness.

7. Work on your mind-body-spirit harmony. Every part of you deserves attention and finding that balance is the key to optimal health and experiencing peace, love, and joy more often.

“I don’t believe in age. I believe in energy. Don’t let age dictate what you can and cannot do.” ~ Tao Porchon-Lynch, 97-year-old yoga teacher

Tweet it like you mean it!

Aging is a blessing and I am free to age as well as I want to. Click To Tweet

If you would want help in creating your healthy and ageless lifestyle then check out my life-coaching services.

Your coach,

Jeanne

From Flailing, to Adulting, to Ageless Living – How I Got My Groove (and You can too)

What is “groove?”

I define “groove” as :: having an established routine or habit(s) which puts one in a state of being comfortable with oneself and their environment.

Furthermore, I would place “finding one’s groove” as a type of enlightenment, an awareness of oneself and their understanding of where they are in the universe.

Here’s a funny meme relating what I mean::Shi(ft) Happens

So it’s taken over 40 years to get to this “enlightenment” phase of my life. Where I now help others with their “shit.” But, it’s only fair to say that I toggle (often) between awareness of my own “shit,” healing it, and then being able to inspire and guide others to do the same.

This latter part is where I think my “groove” is at. I’ve come to the point in life — having developed habits and check systems — where I can come into a situation and see my “shit” in relationship to it and with very little lag time, face and heal it, and then get to the growing and expanding bit that we all love. (Too bad we have to go through that pesky stuff in between.)

The road-map that got me here was filled with bumps, twists, and hazardous cliffs. If you’ve ever seen or heard of the Baha 1000 or any world rally course, life has kind of been like that. And no road is more special or makes someone more deserving of anything. So I know that your road has been just as arduous. Which makes us amazing individuals to have traversed it.

From Flailing, to Adulting, to Ageless Living

I consider my teens and 20s as my flailing years. A time where I mostly felt misunderstood, where I grasped for meaning and connection in the strangest places, and created scenarios of painful learning.

My thirties were my adulting years. A time of doing “grown-up and responsible things,” like focusing on my career, health, and building better relationships. Still, life lessons were a plenty as I began to become self-aware.

As I neared my forties my awakening solidified. Lessons became understandings feeding my growth and expansion. Awareness became second nature, and the life tools I’d been gathering for the last 20+ years became truly useful as I wielded them with more efficiency.

Now fully in my forties, I’m ageless living. I define that as having optimal health, mind-body-spirit coherence, and possessing a timeless attitude. More importantly, I am Queen of me. I’m still learning of course because that’s just part of life, but living in a way where I’m doing so — in my groove.

How can you be in your groove too?

Here are a few steps to finding your groove.

Step 1. Develop habits that help you live the life you want. Habits such as healthy eating, consistent movement, and nurturing self-awareness.

Step 2. Practice self-love and do self-healing on a regular basis. Healing your “shit” is the most important thing in life. It helps you love and accept yourself so that you can just BE. From this place of being, you fall into your groove.

Step 3. Repeat Steps 1 & 2 everrrrrryday until you are in your groove.

To be in your groove is to have established a routine or habit(s) which puts you in a state of being comfortable with yourself and your environment.

IMAGINE :: being comfortable with yourself. Experiencing true self-acceptance.

VISUALIZE :: being generally at ease with people or whatever it is that is going on around you.

What would life be like when you’re in your groove?

Tweet it like you mean it!

I have all the time in the world to find my groove. Click To Tweet It's never too late for me to get my groove on! Click To Tweet

If you want help finding your groove, then check out my life-coaching services.

ROAR!

Your coach,
Jeanne

Is Time Going Too Fast for You and Are You Alarmed?

Time is a precarious thing. Some people feel like time is running out, while others feel like they have all the time in the world. And then there are those who fall somewhere between. Some days, you think time is on your side and everything is going to turn out OK, and then something happens that alarms you to doubt your resolve and frantic panic sets in.

As I try to support my ageless-lifestyle-enthusiast-sisterhood about “timelessness,” this quality of being where we look upon time as our friend and ally — one that’s on our side, supporting our every action — I’d be remiss if I didn’t talk about the doubt that can fester in every person’s mind when another year passes and things have not gone as hoped or planned.

If you’re triggered by the coming speed of the new year and you have a sense that — YOU’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME — you’re not alone. Everyone feels this at some point in their life, and more so as they get older. Until, that moment, they don’t.

Here is the simple truth.

Life is about having a human experience and the time you are allotted is arbitrary.

You don’t know how long you have for this life, but what you should know is that whatever time you do have — is precious.

This idea of time being precious will resonate more as a person gets older and wiser. Though you don’t know when you will pass on in this life, you do have age markers that give you some ideas. People in their 30s can think one-third of their life is gone, and then in their 50s think that half their life is done.

It’s inevitable to come to this conclusion — that time and therefore life is precious — because you know in your human bones that there is an end point.

So what does one do with this knowledge?

Feel. At. Peace.

Time is precious so here’s what to do with the time you have so you can feel peace rather than alarm.

1. Feel your feelings.
2. Heal your hurts.
3. Constantly learn and grow.
4. Have tons of self-compassion.
5. Do things with love.
6. Be grateful.
7. Keep an open mind.

Our time is doled out to our family, friends, work, home, and hopefully to some interesting hobbies and fun physical activities, but no matter what you’re doing with your time — because you know time is precious — you follow these seven ideas.

When your mindset is about feeling your feelings, being grateful, learning, growing, doing things with love, keeping an open mind, being understanding, and healing yourself in the process — what do you think your time is going to be like on this planet?

Exactly. Your time is going to be meaningful.

When a significant portion of your time is spent doing meaningful things, you won’t hear those “running-out-of-time-alarm-bells”  (as often.) Because in truth, those bells only ring for people who pay more attention (worry-more-like) about other things and not these seven simple life enhancing ideas.

The older I get, the more I realize we do too much. Life is more simple than what we make it. Life is about having a human experience. Do that meaningfully, and you will enjoy the time you have.

Life is about having a human experience. Click To Tweet

Final Thoughts

From time to time, you may want to ask yourself:

Is this worth my precious time?

Does this person deserve my precious time?

What could I be doing right now with my precious time?

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. I believe my time is precious and I’m grateful to spend it writing, inspiring, and supporting others to live a meaningful life.

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My time is precious and I try to do what is meaningful to me. Click To Tweet

If you need guidance and inspiration to create a more meaningful life, then check out my life-coaching services.

ROAR!

Your coach,

Jeanne